Real boys vs TV boys

There are some fundamental differences between the boys on TV and the ones in your Science class. We pit Seth Cohen against Seth Science – and blast a few TV clichés in the process.

Myth 1: If a boy chases after you for yonks, it's true love
TV boys: Over in TV land, there’s not much a guy won’t do to get his hands on a girl he likes. He’ll name a boat after her, he’ll get into fist fights, he’ll develop elaborate schemes and jump on tables to declare it to the whole school. It looks romantic from the outside, but honestly, have you ever met such a desperate bunch in your life?
Real boys: Compared to their TV counterparts, real boys are decidedly more subtle. They’ll talk to you at lunch, brush your hand when they show you their new iPod and, if they’re really brave, maybe they’ll ask you out. Sure, there are boys out there who’ll chase and call you incessantly, but there’s a word for people like that - annoying.

Myth 2: If you can’t stand him, you’ll be snogging before long
TV boys: On television, hatred has a funny way of turning into crazed kissing sessions, and the guy you’ve always thought of as a dweeby asshat turns out to be the best boyfriend you’ve ever had. Think Seth and Summer on The OC or Logan and Veronica on Veronica Mars.
Real boys: In real life, the guy who makes your life a living hell normally doesn’t end up taking you to the Year 10 formal. We’re all capable of misjudging people, but most of the time, if there’s a guy you really hate, you hate him for a reason. And if you do end up falling for a guy you started out despising, things usually only end in tears - yours. (See Myth 5.)

Myth 3: Everyone is H-O-T-T-T
TV boys: Okay, think Ryan Donowho’s cheekbones, Chad Michael Murray’s soulful eyes and Jesse Metcalfe’s pectorals. Yep, there’s no doubt about it, TV boys are very fine specimens indeed.
Real boys: Sure, the playing field’s a little uneven on this one, but remember that simply being on TV can make people seem hotter (call it the fame factor). Also - most of the guys who play teenagers on TV are actually around 25, and that most people are hotter when they’re 25 than they are at 15.

Myth 4: It’s chatter time
TV boys: When TV boys aren’t chasing after girls they have the hots for like dogs to meat trucks, they’re talking. If their name is Seth Cohen, they never stop talking. Sure, it’s partly because they have to talk to keep the script moving, but TV boys definitely get an A+ for communication. Well, an A- at the very least.
Real boys: We don’t want to perpetuate stereotypes here, but in this case there’s some truth to them. Most boys don’t like talking about feelings, relationships or even sex (well, not when you’re around, at least). And some don’t like talking at all (especially to the opposite sex), which would make for a not-so-interesting episode of The OC but a pretty standard first date for most verbally challenged guys.

Myth 5: Breaking up is hard to do
TV boys: Impossible, actually. TV couples break up all the time, but it usually doesn’t last very long. And even when it lasts for a while, most end up getting back together within another couple of seasons, providing one of the characters doesn’t get written out of the series. TV break-ups are full of tears, emotional phone calls and the same kinds of grand romantic gestures you see when the couples first get together. (See Myth 1.)
Real boys: Real life break-ups are full of tears and emotional phone calls too – but most of you ex-boy’s tears will probably happen in private. Which, if you’ve ever been dumped and wished your ex-boyfriend would be miserable too, kinda sucks. Real life break-ups also have a tendency to last longer than TV ones, partly because our social circles usually contain more than four people, and partly because we don’t have plotlines and ratings hinging on who we’re dating.

SIDEBAR: 4 ways you're not like the girls on TV either
1. You’re more popular
Yes, you are. Summer Roberts may have been voted prom queen, but how many friends did she have? That’s right, one.
2. You’re interested in more things
Girls on TV never seem to think about anything other than boys, clothes… and occasionally solving crime.
3. You live a real life
With homework, jobs and embarrassing moments – all things TV girls miss out on. All that reality’s got to be good for the soul. Um, right?
4. You’re interesting
Ever noticed how on TV it’s the pretty-but-boring girls who steal the show (paging Marissa Cooper)? Real life isn’t like that, and thank god.

- Rachel Hills

Published in Girlfriend, December 2006.